Say Yes to the Dress!

So I think I am finally able to say “yes to the dress.” This comes after I probably tried on over 100 gowns in almost ten different bridal shops. And let me tell you, there is nothing fun or magical when you are trying on your 95^th gown.

During this whole process I learned that I listened to others way to much. Everyone felt entitled to give me their opinion and then they expected to follow their expert advice. Of course the members of my bridal entourage had an opinion. But so did the sales clerk, and the random other dress shoppers, and casual acquaintances in my life.  Everybody had an opinion and advice. And I actually welcome their opinions and certainly their advice, because sometimes it helps me re-evaluate a decision. But what I can’t stand is that most people think that their expert opinions are ironclad and I am a damn fool not to follow them.  I am sorry that is horribly offensive to you that I am not getting married in a church. And I know you think I am going to look back and curse this decision, but if we want to get married outside under some trees like a bunch of heathens then so be it. It isn’t your soul that is going to be sent to damnation. 

And people like to scare you into following their opinions by promising that you will regret not heeding their advice.  But at the end of the day, I am getting married to my bestfriend. And there is no way I can control every little detail, so I ought to just enjoy the day and bigger meaning behind it.  Everyone says you don’t remember your wedding day because it passes in such a blur. So why would I obsess over which white wine to offer. 

I am too nice to tell people to politely back the **** off. So I just smile and nod and act extremely grateful for them forcing their opinions down my throat.  But in the back of my mind I am getting more and more nervous and anxious about my wedding. There is no way I can please everyone, and frankly I am not that interested in catering to every single whim some of my more eccentric guests might have. So I ask Clint, can’t we just run away and get married with just us and immediate family?!!

                                           My gorgeous ring! 

I can see he is trying to be ok with that, because he wants to make me happy. But I know he would like to have a semi-traditional wedding. So I decide to grow a backbone. I am going to get married and have a modest ceremony. And I will probably have to invite a few guests I don’t know. But I will be the one making the decisions and if anyone has any problems with that, I will show them where they can sign on the bill, because Clinton and I are paying for this ourselves. So if you don’t like how we are spending our hard earned money, feel free to contribute your money to whatever detail doesn’t meet your standards.

I realize I might sound a bit pyscho. Like put that lady in a padded room and that her throw a fit. But I finally had enough and I am going to put a stop to the foolishness.  And I promptly started this new attitude by going and trying on dresses by myself (this was mainly because where I was going was not convenient to anyone else on that day). But I found a dress that I truly loved and at a price I loved even more. And I got a chance to enjoy it before I shared it with a few people. And even if they had some critiques it didn’t matter because this is my dress. I realized that if I listened to every single person’s critique I would never find a dress I like. So I just have to hope that the dress I pick is able to appeal to the majority.

I will have to say, the members of my bridal party (and Kip) did keep me from purchasing some dresses that could only qualify as a hot messes. Because in addition to being unable to say no to opinionated acquaintances, I am also unable to say no to pushy sales people who stuff me in whatever dress they think they can sucker me into buying.  “Oh no that dress is top of the line. I know it looks like a nine year old went crazy with a bedazzler and some glitter glue, but it is just so hot.” You know if I wanted my dress to look like a creation by an elementary school student, I would probably just go pick out a dress at the local thrift store and drop it off at the elementary school down the street from my house.  But I still had a hard time turning the sales woman down. What is wrong with me?? I need to learn the word no.

But all that aside, I have found the dress that I can see myself getting married in. It doesn’t break the bank. And it is traditional enough to keep Clinton happy.  Even though he told me I could spend as much as I need on the dress, I can tell he is pleased that I kept it to a reasonable amount. Maybe we can use the extra money to purchase my basset hound………